Heart of Tanzanite
by little-nessieC
Summary: Sequel to 'Crimson Tide'. Lots of drama I promise you! Edward left for college and Bella only gets to see him on the weekends. But that's the only start to her problems.. Very sweet story, give it a chance!
1. THE NOTE

**Heart of Tanzanite **

**Ch. 1 'The Note'**

Bella,

I'm hoping you followed all the rules. It's really important that you did. You're a good girl, so I know you listened and did exactly what I told you to do. That's one of the things I love about you, you listen.

As you're reading this, it's 10:00pm on Sunday night. And right now, at this very moment, I am laying awake in my new bed, in my new apartment, in my new city...thinking only of you.

Right now, I'm seeing you smile, the sun hitting you from every angle as we're walking on the beach together like we did all summer. Your hair is shining and flowing gently in the wind.

It kills me that I know right now you are in deed, not smiling. And I'm know you're not smiling because you're sad. You're sad because I'm gone, and you miss me.

I miss you too.

I wish things had been different, I wish we didn't have to be separated like this. But, although I know this year is going to be rough, with the two of us being apart, I just wanted you to know that I am thinking of you. Always.

When your done reading this, look out your window and look at the moon. (And I checked the weather channel, it's not raining in Forks so you can actually see the moon. Can you believe it?) And as you look at the moon, know that I'm looking at it too. I'm thinking of you.

Have a good night sweetheart and tomorrow, enjoy your first day of you senior year of high school.

Love you,

Edward

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**What do you guys think so far? So I know it wasn't much of a chapter but still, I liked the way I kicked it off.**


	2. The Mermaid's Purse

***Peeks head out from under rock* Uh...hi guys. So um...don't hate ok? It's been awhile since I've wrote anything but I'M HERE NOW right? Isn't that what matters? Anyhoo, here is the first chapter, enjoy!**

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**The Mermaid's Purse**

EPOV

Was it possible to explore from pure happiness? Guess not, seeing as I have yet to explode.

I watch as the sun faded behind an over sized cloud, the light shimmering and bouncing off the water. Oranges and purples and streaks of red filled the sky. This was the perfect time of day. It was Twilight. The heat of the summer day had past, so things were cool and the gentle breezes kept coming. My shoes were off and my toes were digging in the sand, I felt like I was on the edge of the universe.

"Edward?" The only thing that could break my concentration was the voice of my very own personal angel. My Bella.

"Down here." I called to her. "Bella, look at that." I nodded to the sight before me, awed and dazed at it's beauty. Surely, Bella would appreciate the view as I did.

"Beautiful." Bella's voice was soft as she approached me from my side. She wrapped her arms around my waist and in doing so, the warmth of her body hit me. It felt as if an angel had wrapped it's wings around me, filling me with love and protection.

The whole world was at my fingertips, ah well...toe tips. I looked out into the ocean, and knew without a doubt, that I knew the true meaning of life.

To be happy.

And what really had made me happy wasn't what I was looking at right now. The beauty of the sight before me did not compare to the woman that, despite my imperfections and qualms, she still loved me. I was blessed.

"Bet they don't have a sunset like that in Seattle." Bella huffed and squeezed tighter on my waist.

"You're right." I kissed the top of her head as the sweet scent of strawberry flooded me. "I guess I'll have to come back down to Forks more often then."

"Is that all you'll come back down to Forks for?" She teased. "The sunsets?"

And this is where my heart started to sink. The day had been beautiful, magical even. A day like this should never have to end. But as time passes, things change. Like me for instance. Just a few short months ago my life was 'Bellaless' as Alice would say. How was I to know that just one person, one girl could change my life so completely. Change my life for the better.

Bella had been quiet when I first told her that I was leaving for college. She was proud and remained positive as she sat on my bed and watch me pack up my belongings. She even helped me clean out my new apartment before we moved our stuff in...Jasper and I, seeing as he was my new roommate. The sight of Bella on her hands and knees scrubbing our new bathroom floor all but made me die of laughter. She was personally offended that the dirt and scrum would not remove themselves. It wasn't until three hours later that I realized that Bella was taking her frustration out on my bathroom tile.

"Bella," I called to her. "We can talk about this." I had told her, as I took the damn floor cleaner away.

"I just..." She huffed, looking defeated. "I just don't understand why things just have to be so damn...wrong." We spent two hours talking and figuring things out that day. She told me that it scared her that I was going to be so far away. I reminded her that Seattle wasn't too far, and I made plans to visit every weekend. She told me that relationships fail when they become long distance. I told her that what we had was more than a relationship. She agreed.

I also told her that I loved her and after, she kissed me. Kissed me like she had never kissed me before. And then feelings started to change. We moved our bodies so that I was now on top of her, her hands wild in my hair. Our kisses were deeper and our breathing accelerated. My hands seem to roam her entire body, up and down. I couldn't get enough of her.

Then Jasper had to go and open is big mouth.

"Guys!" He called from the living room. "Pizzas here!"

I looked back down at Bella lying under me on the cold tile floor of the bathroom and just as I opened my mouth to apologize for my rude behavior and my roaming hands...Bella giggled.

"Edward come look!" Bella's voice echoed from down the water, breaking me out my memories. She was poking at something with a stick, and cringing away and squealing every now and them. I left the view in front of me to go investigate.

"What is it?" I asked as I approached her further down the shore.

"I think it's a crab...or something." She bit her lip. "But it's not moving so maybe it's dead."

I looked at the object closely and then, deciding that it was not in deed and dead crap, I picked it up. "It's a mermaid's purse." I held it and with my free hand, took Bella's hand in my own. "And it's for you."

Bella smiled at my gesture and then, as time stopped dead in it's tracks, her eyes met mine. Would I ever get use to her beauty? Probably not seeing as she continues to stun me with every glance. "Thanks," She says as she takes my gift, never letting our hands move from one another. "I guess I'll keep this to remind me of you." She whispered.

"It's only temporary Bella." I brought her close to my side and kissed her head again for the millionth time today. "It's not forever, I promise. Besides," I looked down into her eyes, "You'll be so busy as a senior this year, you'll hardly even notice I'm gone."

"And you'll be so busy meeting college girls you'll hardly remember you have a girlfriend." She hung her head low.

"Ah, but you see," I teased her, hoping that she would forget her last upsurd remark, "I'll have my own apartment. You'll be able to come and go as you please with no parental authority. You could even spend the night." Bella's breath caught in her throat and before I could even comprehend the words I had just spoken, she blushed.

"Edward..." She hesitated.

"Bella I didn't mean it like that. You know I'm not in any hurry to..."

"I know what you mean. But still, it's a nice idea. Me coming and going as I please I mean." She smiled. "Besides, I bet when those college girls find out how your girlfriend is half crazy, they'll want to stay clear of you." She giggled.

"Half-crazy. Yup, that's defiantly you." I teased.

"But you love me anyway." Bella stated.

"Yes," I laughed. "I love you anyway."

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**Chapter TWO will be up probably shortly. I won't keep you guys waiting like I have been doing. I'm back in full swing baby! A couple of chapters are prewritten so stay tuned and be sure to 'alert' so you don't miss out!**

**P.S. I've updated my 'wrap up' chatper of CRIMSON TIDE so if you'd like to see your username up, then go check it out! What are you waiting for? Huh?**


	3. My Own Personal Jesus

**My Own Personal Jesus**

**BPOV**

"Do you see it?" Alice was usually not one for gossip, and I had to give her credit for not being one to judge, but when it came to fashion, it was a whole different ball game. "Seriously?"

"Only Jessica." I shook my head letting the 'a' in Jessica's name roll of my tongue in an unusually high pitch manner.

"Who does that?" Alice titled her head to the side, lost in thought.

"Apparently, Jessica does." Just then, Jessica crossed her legs from her seat at her lunch room table, and honestly I wasn't trying to stare, but it's sort of like a car crash. You can not look away.

"Oh lord!" My face was red now, seeing I've seen the parts of Jessica I wasn't meant to see.

"Rule number one of fashion ladies," Alice turned to the two freshman at our lunch table. Alice's 'children' as I like to call them. "If you are going to wear a skirt, make sure you also wear approiate undergarments." The two 14 year olds giggled. "No one should ever had their lady parts visible for the whole students body."

"I thought you said skirts where not acceptable for the first day of school?" Freshman number one asked.

"That's right. Good job paying attention Claudia." Claudia. I'd have to remember that. Freshman number one, her name is Claudia. "And can you tell me just why that is a very important rule to follow?"

"Because you never know what could happen." Freshman number two answered. "You never know where you'll be sitting, or who you'll be sitting next to. Too many things could go wrong and you're first impression is out the window. There is no coming back after that."

"Very good. And now you see why. Tell me girls, what do you think of said Jessica?" Alice waved her hand over to the skank in question. "Now that we've seen all of her, and I do mean all, what sort of impression does she leave on you?"

"I'll see you later Alice." I stood from our lunch table, unable to take another minute of Alice's 'Fashion Letcure Rules of Forks High School' anymore.

"Bye Bella. I'll see you after last block."

"Kay."

"Goodbye Bella. Have a nice day." The freshman twins said in unison.

Alice was always finding loopholes in any requirements Forks High set. Like last year when were forced to wear brown, Alice remade her uniform from fabric imported from France that it was more of a 'coffee color' than brown or, so she thought. This year, for Independent Study course, Alice had taken two freshman under her wings. She'd show them around the school, make sure they knew the basics of Forks High. She even coordinated hairstyles for each day of the week. Apparently, my classic, my-hair-has-a-mind-of-it's-own, didn't work for her. She said, "Our hair is the only thing we have to take care of. Our clothes are picked out. Our shoes, even our socks are already apart of the dress code. If all I have to do in the morning is my hair, you'd better believe it's going to look fabulous."

My phone vibrated in my pocket, signaling that I have a new text. Since Forks High frowned upon the use of mobile communication devices, I dodged my way into the girls restroom.

_How is it so far?_

There could only be one person on this whole planet that actually cared if my first day back at school was actually going good.

Edward.

_I should be asking u the same question._

Today was Edward's first day of college. It marked the start of our new situation. He was in Seattle, I was stuck in Forks. Well, actually Alice was stuck with me, but she was actually enjoying having Jasper away. She said having a college boyfriend that lives far away makes her feel older and more mature. She liked spending the weekends with him. She even liked the fact that she had her own drawer in his dresser for her personal items when they decided to have a sleepover.

I wanted this kind of relationship with Edward too. I wanted to come spend the night with him.

_I'm stuck in orientation actually. They're making us all hold hands, LOL._

I keep a picture of Edward hung up in my locker. I've never kissed it though. I haven't been that desperate, yet. It was my own personal reminder that Edward was still with me, even in spirit. I couldn't believe how much my life revolved around him. It was like he was apart of me. Without him I was not whole. The strong hearted woman in me screamed in rebellion but I was too far gone on cloud nine to notice. Besides, mine and Edward's relationship was special. He made me feel like a million bucks and he encouraged me to do things in life I had only even dreamt of. He was my rock. And since our relationship was nothing but positive, I didn't really care that I needed his support so much. Other women could get by not having to emotionally depend on men, I was not one of those women. I needed Edward like the damn fish needed the ocean.

_You poor thing. _I texted him back.

By now, the whole town of Forks was aware of mine and Edward's relationship. The town rivalry had died down, people merged with one another, although Jessica Swank still thought of me as the reason why her brother, James, was taken off. Last year at the school's bonfire, things got a little too hot and heavy which is advances were not welcomed. It was his own fault for his actions. Jessica would just have to deal with the fact that her brother was a problem.

_I can't wait for you to come see our place. It looks so different from the last time you were here. We're almost completely unpacked. Jasper has a problem with organization tho. _

Jasper and Edward are roommated now in an apartment close to campus. When you have unlimited funds as Edward did, you can do that.

_Enjoying your bachelor pad I take it?_

Things had changed for Rosalie as well. She had signed with one of the top modeling agencies in the world, it just so happens they're based out of Seattle. She makes close to a billion per picture. (Ok, so maybe not a billion, but damn close.)

_Not a bachelor pad, just a pad. I'm taken remember? Or has my one and only moved on so quickly? I thought high school girls went crazy for college guys? _Edward teased.

Rosalie bought herself a condo, were Emmett now lives. He goes to V.U. with Jasper and Edward, but in seeing the dorms, he scrambled last minute to find housing. Thus, trusty old Rosalie took him in and Emmett hasn't left since.

_Hey, I found your letter. _And that said letter was now in my pocket of my jeans, where it would stay for the rest of my life. The most romantic gesture of all life and half-crazy me had to go and cry about it. I guess the emotions of Edward leaving were really starting to build up. I had spent everyday with him this summer, and I knew it would be a change going a whole week without him. Edward had said that school would keep me busy, that I wouldn't even have time to notice his absence. But this is me we're talking about. Hello!

_Did you like it? _He asked.

Of course I liked it. How could I have not? _I loved it. _I texted him.

_Hey, I got to go. I'll call you tonight ok? _

_Sure, but after 9 alright. You know my dad.... _I had been having issues with Charlie since the whole James thing last year. He was just worried about me, I knew that but I didn't understand why he had to be so hard on Edward. It wasn't like Edward was the reason any of that happened. So ever since then, Edward was only allowed in the house on weekends and only for certain hours. And I had a curfew. It was the first time in my life I had a curfew, I didn't really know how to handle it. On one hand, I was glad to have some sort of partental supervision. It was nice to be the 'child' in the relationship for once instead of the adult. But on the other hand....COME ON! It wasn't like I was sneaking out, or having wild crazy sex with guys I didn't know. Charlie acted like I was on drugs for crying out loud! If he kept this up, I'd have to throw a fit.

_Ok, 9pm it is then. Miss you. _

_Miss you more. _Edward was the sweetest guy ever. How did I ever get to be so lucky?

"Swan!" Someone called my name from the hallway. I quickly turned off my phone and hid it in my book bag, the rule for cell phones at school was that if I got caught using one, they'd take it away and never give it back. I tried to tell them that it was illegal, theft would be a better word, but no one wanted to listen to me. They listen should though. I was the Chief's daughter, of course I knew the law.

I didn't hear my name called again after that but I stayed in the bathroom for just a minute to calm myself. I normally wasn't the kind of person who had anxiety. I hardly ever got nervous, but as I stared in the mirror looking back at my pale face, I couldn't shake off the feeling that something bad was about to happen.

I shook my head fearlessly, and took a deep breath. And with that, I headed to my next class, eager for this day to be over. I was ready to get that call from Edward tonight. And more than willing to go visit his apartment this weekend. Would this week ever end?

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**Do you like the sequel so far? Better than CRIMSON TIDE? Let me know what you guys think ok?**

**Next chapter will be from EPOV. It's going to rock. Make sure you read it. **


	4. Out of the Ordinary

**Told you guys I'd be updating sooner...**

**Out of the Ordinary**

"Well, she didn't say anything to me the whole class! I was prepared for her smartass side remarks or even an evil glare or two but nothing. She said nothing! She just sat there, rock solid. It was a bit scary actually."

"I'm sure she's over the whole James situation Bella. Besides, you have nothing to be afraid about." I tried to make my voice as soothing as possible, I knew this wasn't the easiest thing for Bella right now. I wanted nothing more than for my girl's first day of her senior year of high school to be great, and for the most part, it was. Bella told me about how she found my letter late last night and it was so sweet she cried. And how this morning Alice had showed up bright and early to get her ready for school. Bella said her first day back was pretty normal, up until her last class with Jessica.

"How about you? How was your first day?" Bella asked, yawning.

My first day of college wasn't at all what I thought it was going to be like. I have imagined frat boys running naked through the hallways or even a few drunken fights to break out. What I was not planning on was having some of the worlds greatest professors teaching me. Granted it was only the first day and I didn't get any one on one time with any of them, but still. Just being in their presence made you feel smarter, more enlightened. I couldn't wait for Bella to come next year. It was true, I loved it here at VU in Seattle. I felt as if this place was just waiting for me to come, it was warm and inviting and the other students actually had opinions to topics in which I found interesting. Maybe everyone was so nice because it was the first day, but no matter what the reason, I found VU to my liking.

"Bella I can't wait for you to come here next year. The people here are all so interesting. Plus, there is a coffee shop on almost every corner, you'll have your pic of you daily cup of joe." The thought of Bella at school with me next year made my heart fly. I could just imaging sitting next to her in classes, walking to and from events. Or even making plans to meet up for a study group in the massive VU library. I can just see it now...

"What kind of classes are you taking this semester?" Bella whispered. Charlie must be not completely knocked out. I was grateful for Charlie in his attempts to protect Bella. She was the type of girl that needed protection, that I was sure of. But what I didn't understand was why Charlie thought she needed protection from me? Of all people! I hated the idea of sneaking around his back just to even talk to his daughter. Did he have any idea how important she was to me?

"Is you dad still sleeping?" I asked, afraid that if she got caught talking to me, she'd end up in trouble and I wouldn't be able to speak to her for awhile. That, and I was overly excited to see her this weekend.

"Yeah, he's such a light sleeper." She whispered again.

"I can call you tomorrow if you want. First thing in the morning after Charlie leaves." I said.

"Don't be redicious Edward. Your first class isn't til 11 and it AP Bio. You'll need all the sleep you can get just to have enough energy to stay focused." She giggled. I loved her giggles, they were so light hearted and honest.

"You memorized my schedule?" I asked, my voice hinting at the smile on my lips.

"Of course I did." She whispered/giggled. "I am your crazy girlfriend aren't I?"

"Half-crazy remember? The other half is perfectly sane." I teased.

"Yeah, well seeing as I have to sit next to Jessica Swank all year, my sane part might end up more crazy than we thought." She yawned.

"Bella sweetheart, get some sleep, you're beat. And don't let Jessica get to you. She knows what Alice would do to her if she tired something. I'll call you in the morning, promise. Ok?"

"Sure, sure." She yawned again. "Have a good night. Love you."

"Love you too. Night."

BPOV

Edward didn't call.

And it wasn't like him to break his promises. Granted, a reminder to call me wasn't that big of an issue but still, a promise is a promise and Edward's word was rock solid. It worried me a little but I let pass seeing as he was just probably tired or maybe even he had become so busy that he forgot. I thought about giving him a quick text, but figured that yes, he was indeed busy and when he called tonight like he does everynight, he'd apologize and tell me about all the fun and interesting things he learned that day.

I also thought about telling him how I woke up an hour earlier than usual just to make sure I didn't miss his call, but decided against it. It might make him feel bad and I didn't want to hurt his feelings.

School passed in a daze. One class after the next. Trusty Alice always by my side.

"So I told Jasper we were coming this weekend. I think I might spend the night again...it's fun." Usually at this point in the conversation, I would stop Alice. It was my way of telling her the convo had gotten too personal and I did not want to hear about her sex life with Jasper. And I didn't want her to know I was envious of her sex life, seeing as I didn't have one. But when I didn't stop her, she raised her eyebrows and gave me a look that only a best friend could give.

"Alice?" I leaned in closer to her at our lunch table. "How did you know you were ready to...you know...go all the way with Jasper?" Alice's eyes, usually calm and collective, shot up real big, no doubt she knew where this conversation was heading.

"Are you thinking about taking yours and Edward's relationship to the next level?" She questioned. I nodded my head, too embarrassed to speak actual words. " Well, let me say this as your friend first. Be safe. As Edward's sister, and this is so gross and I'm trying really hard not to think about it, I know first hand that Edward is clean. I mean, he doesn't have anything you'd need to worry about."

I waved my hand, dismissing the subject. Edward had told me over the summer that he had never felt this way before with anyone. And I knew for a solid fact that he was nothing more than a gentlemen, so in conclusion, he was a virgin. Just like me. Some people would be turned off by the idea of two virgins together, I on the other hand, thought it was sweet. Besides, majority of the people at my old school had lost their virginity in middle school, some even had children already.

"I know he's clean Alice. You don't need to go into detail. I was just wondering how did you know it was the right time?" I took a sip of my soda, I wasn't really thirsty, I just needed something to do with my hands, so I wouldn't bite off my nails.

"I don't know Bella." Well that answer didn't work for me. I needed more than that. "These things just happen. One minute you are perfectly happy with the way things are and then the next...." She huffed and blew her short bangs out of her eyes. "You just...know, ya know?"

"No, I don't know." I rolled my eyes. "That's why I'm asking you."

Alice laughed. "Maybe I'm not the right person you should be talking to. I've only been with Jasper a couple of times. Maybe you should talk to Rosalie. She's more of the expert in this department."

I decided that Alice was right. I needed to talk to Rosalie and I needed to talk to her before this weekend. If I was really going to have a roll around in the sac with Edward, I needed to know just how these things happened. I blushed at the thought of Edward seeing my body without clothing. And then I blushed even deeper as I imaged talking to Rosalie about all of this. And then, just as I pictured myself laying next to Edward, sleeping soundlessly beside him, I also imaged other things. I thought about how much it would hurt. I thought about not being enough for him. I thought about waking up alone and cold.

I shook the thoughts out of my head just as quickly as then appeared. If I wasn't 100% sure how Edward felt about me was real, I wouldn't be able to go through this at all. I stood from the lunch table in one quick motion, amazing myself in the process, and then Alice and I headed back into the school building. Alice more eager than I, to finish out the school day.

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** I know you guys are wondering about when I am going to have a chapter where B and E are actually together and I must say...you'll just have to wait. Next chapter is from EPOV and it goes more into detail of his new life at school. Juicy Juicy, I must warn! **


	5. An Unexpected Error

**An Unexpected Error**

**EPOV**

"In conclusion, your grade will reflect on how much you have learned this semester for this course, not how much you can BS me." Everyone is the front row of my A.P. Science course laughed at Mr. Wisers side remark. What a perfect name. Mr. Wisers was quickly becoming my new favorite teacher, I felt as if I could learn so much from him. He was a bubble. Full of knowledge and wisdom and I was his needle, ready to pop him and soak up everything there was to soak.

"Now, if you could please turn to each other and introduce yourselves to you new lab partners, that would be greatly appreciated."

I smiled at the girl beside me, I had nodded to hear earlier, when she first sat down and in being the gentlemen that I was, I was going to introduce myself then, but Mr. Wisers decided to start class just then.

"Hi." She said, clear and full of confidence. "My name is Amber."

"Hi Amber." I smiled at her. "Edward."

"Nice to meet you Edward, so I don't know about you, but so far Mr. Wisers seem like an ok dude." Her smile was bright and there was an edge of innocence to her that looked so familar to me. She reminded me of Bella.

"Yeah, he's quickly becoming one of my favorite professors." Amber nodded in agreement.

"This your first year?" She asked as she pulled out a pack of gum from her purse, offering me a piece.

I shook my head 'no' to the gum. "Yeah, my first semester at VU and I'm loving it so far. How about you? You a freshman?"

"Technically." She laughed. "This is my second year here, but seeing as I pay out of pocket for tuition, I don't have enough credits under my belt to be called a sophomore, officially that is."

"So what's your major." I asked, trying to keep our conversation going.

"Nursing. Maybe Social Work or even Sociology. I did take a class last semester on Education and it seemed like a lot of fun." She announced. "Although at this rate, I should pick a major soon or else I'll be in college for the rest of my life." She laughed at herself.

"Yeah, well my advice is to just do whatever makes you happy."

"Happy doesn't pay the bills." She said under her breath. "But I get your point. How about you, what's your major."

And for the rest of the class period, that's how it went. Amber and I talked about so much I knew she was going to be a good friend. She knew about football but was forbidden to play at her old school, she was just too quick for the big football players to catch when she ran by. The coaches had concluded that it was just 'unfair' to the other players. She also like to read and write, 'just like Bella' I added mentally. She loved to eat but hated to cook. And to top all of it off, she was actually pretty smart. It was nice to have a lab partner that could hold their own.

Later that evening, Jasper and I were eating from some left over Chinese food, planning our party for this weekend. Actually, it didn't start out as a party. Just the usual gang over to watch a movie. Emmett and Rose, Alice and of course my Bella. But in speaking with Jasper I had learned that he had invited a few of his buddies from his history club, Alice had seen a few girls on campus that she said were coming as well. Emmett knew some football buddies and Rosalie's modeling agencies had set up a 'buddy system' for her to follow. With so many new models all of which were pretty young, each contracted model was paired with one another. It was a way to learn from each other but also a way to stay safe in the city of Seattle.

Amber had given me her cell number during class so I texted her and told her about the party. She texted back and confirmed that she would be there.

It was getting closer to 9pm, and I knew I had to make up for my shortened phone call with Bella from last night, so I headed to the shower early, hoping that Bella wasn't too tired from her day because I wanted to tell her about Amber. I was sure they'd make good friends.

The hot water felt good as it hit my neck, almost like getting a message so I stayed in the shower a bit longer than I normally would have. When I got back to my room, my clock read 7:12pm, I had a good while before I had to call Bella, and due to my super hot shower, I was feeling very tired. I decided to lay down and rest my eyes for awhile...

**BPOV**

When I got home from school that day, I felt totally out of my element. I'd like to think it was due to the fact of sitting by Jessica Swank for an entire hour but really, I knew the real cause. I hadn't spoken to Edward all day. Not even a text. I was so use to him being at my beckon call, that I literally could not function with out him. It was a bit scary.

Sure, I guess texting goes both ways. I could at any time have whipped out my cell phone and shot him a quick message. But I wasn't sure how busy he was. Wait, scratch that. I knew he was busy. Why else wouldn't he have called like he said he would? So I decided not to text or call him. I figured he'd get around to it whenever he had the time. He was a busy college man now.

Charlie was home when I got there, which was odd. Something must have been up. "Dad?" I called out into the living room. Maybe there was an early football game on that he couldn't wait to get home to watch. "You home?"

"In here Bells." His voice, full of....sadness? What was going on?

"Dad, is everything alright?" I found my dad sitting at the kitchen table, looking blankly into the table. No food, no drink. "What happened?" I whispered.

"Don't freak out ok?" He warned.

I sat on the opposite side of the kitchen table, my nerves going haywire. "No freaking out. Gotcha ya."

"I'm not sure how to tell you this." Charlie started.

"James?" My eyes started to water. Now, of all times, I wished Edward was here with me. He would know exactly what to say to make everything better. He'd know exactly the right way to hold me to make me feel secure. Protected.

"No, not James." Charlie shook his head. He knew that even though James and securely behind bars, I still feared him. Or more so, I feared for what I knew what he was capable of.

"Then what's wrong? Mom? Phil?" I moved to the edge of my chair, eager for him to just spit it out. But on the other hand, I hoped he'd kept this information forever. I never wanted to deal with pain again in my life. I couldn't handle anymore of it. Not now. Not ever.

"It's Jacob Bells." Charlie hung his head.

"What...what happened?" I chocked back vomit. What had happened to Jacob to cause my father to be in much dismay?

"He was playing with those kids from La Push, daring each other to extremes. Anyway, one of them, I forget which one, dared him to jump from the highest cliff."

"Oh my! Oh my gosh! Dad! Is Jacob ok?" I couldn't control the level of my voice, nor could I control the emotion behind it.

"He was messed up pretty bad. He'll be in the hospital for awhile. I'm sorry Bella. I knew he is your friend and I thought you should know."

"Yeah. Yeah, thanks dad for telling me." I shook my head, the image of Jacob plunging into the deep, cold, wild waters gave me the chills. "Can I go visit him?"

"I was actually thinking about going down there myself. To help Billy." Charlie stood from his chair. "You wanna ride."

"I'd like that."

* * *

**Next chapter is going to be...super...duper...long!**

**This chapter's wrap up for you guys. **

**1. ) Edward forgot to call Bella that morning.**

**2. ) Edward met Amber in class. (Don't worry.)**

**3. ) Edward made plans to call Bella that evening but he fell asleep instead.**

**4. ) Bella is saddened that Edward didn't call when he said he would but she doesn't want to be a pesky gf.**

**5. ) Jacob was being stupid and jumped off a cliff and really got himself all banged up. (There is a point to this, I mean...there is a reason why I had Jacob jump. It will make sence later on, you'll see.)**

**and **

**6. ) Upon leaving her house with her dad to go see Jacob at the hospital, Bella forgot her phone...**

**Next chapter up tomorrow! Stay tuned...**


	6. To Be Perfectly Honest

**To Be Perfectly Honest**

**EPOV**

I had a clear vision in my head, one filled with wild colors all of them taking upon different shapes. I knew I was dreaming because each shape represented something different. Black, which normally meant death or evil, to me meant calm and silence. In my dream it was night, and the blackness was all around me. It was more of a blanet, thick and warm. Purple meant wild and free. Shades arrowed across the black, until finally they merged together. Then there was red. Deep, vibrant red and I knew it meant danger, I couldn't however, see where the danger was coming from. The black and purples were too overwhelming, to sincere. It was like a big puzzle, one in which I could not put together properly.

My eyes popped open with a start. My dream had been so real and the darkness of my bedroom didn't help matters. Something was defantly off. I felt disoriented, disabled and confused. My body knew I wasn't where I was meant to be. Yes, I was alone in my bed in the middle of the night, but my heart and my soul were elsewhere. They were with Bella. What a strange thing love of Bella automatically brought a sort of calmness over me, even more so than the blacks and purples of my dream. I loved that she had that power over me.

Damn it!

It was the middle of the night and I hadn't called her like I said I would. I had just one promise to keep, and I had broken it. My clock read 1:52am. She'd defiantly be sleeping, so I decided to give her a quick text, even if she didn't recieve it til morning, she'd at least know that I was sorry. Maybe even brighten her mood for the day. How wouldn't want to start their day with a sweet text from their beloved?

_I am so so sorry! I fell asleep. Please forgive me?_

Then, just as I hit the 'send' button, I remembered that yesterday before my first class, I was suppose to call her to make up for our shortened conversation the other night.

Damn it!

I am such a jerk! Bella was probably imagining all kinds of crazy reason why I hadn't called her. It was just like her to worry that way, even though she had no reason to. I had a lot to make up for.

I knew Bella wouldn't text back, she'd be sleeping. But that didn't stop me from sending her a new text.

_Sorry, for not calling you the other morning. I forgot. Honestly._

I thought seriously about sending her a picture of me with a sad face but decided againist it, seeing that it was a bit corney...it would be something Emmett would have done. Maybe I'd send her a written note, like the one I sent the day I left Forks. The post would take a few days to get to her, so that defeated the purpose of my note entirely.

I hoped and prayed Bella would understand. I mentally slapped my forgetful ass! What if something with Jessica happened at school? What if she was really upset by something and needed to talk to me? Had she called and I missed it? I checked my messages, no missed calls, nothing new in my inbox. Maybe Bella was busy with school as well. Senior year is a big deal. My girl had straight A's and I knew she enjoyed the fine art of reading. Plus, being the sole care provider for her father left her pretty busy. What time she did have to herself she usually spent with me. Now that I was away, I was positive Alice and Angela were stepping up to the plate to take my place. That was nice. I thanked my lucky stars Bella had such amazing friends. And this weekend, she'd get to spend sometime with Rosalie. That would be great. We all needed a breather. I'm sure everyone's week had been as hectic as mine.

The next day classes went by as they usually did. Students were getting into the full swing of things. I had gotten my routine down packed. I knew exactly where my classes were and I knew just which route to take to get to them. I avoided the 'traffic areas'. The areas in which too many students hung around, too many greek people wanting freshmen to pledge. I wasn't interested in any of that.

By the time lunch came around, I had met Jasper in the 'quad' for some good old grub. That's another thing I liked about V.U. It had good food.

"So Alice says she's talked two more girls into coming to our party." Jasper scraffed down another hot dog. "Alice said she's getting things set up for next year, when she's enrolled here. She said it's never too early to make a good impression." Jasper laughed, he was awed by my sister. "Also, she says it good to have a good friend base."

"What else does Alice say?" I teased my best friend who also happened to be completely whipped by my little sister. "Oh the great Alice. She knows all!" I joked.

"Alice is a great girl." Jasper said, his voice steady and certain. "Both on the inside and out."

"Dude," I warned. "Don't even go there. That's my sister you're talking about." I didn't mind so much that Jasper and Alice's relationship had hit a higher level. Just the opposite actually. I was so happy for Alice to find true love so early in life. Why would I ever want to damper her mood seeing I was in the same boat. Alice had Jasper as I had Bella. And I was also happy Jasper had finally gotten laid. I just tried not to think about just whom, was laying him.

"Sorry." Jasper mummered and continued with his meal.

I wondered why Bella hadn't texted me back yet? Could she be upset? I hoped not. Jasper had been planning this weekend get together for so long. I didn't want a sour mood to upset it all. Thinking of having Bella over this weekend made me so happy. I hadn't seen her in almost a whole week, and it was beginning to show. I wanted to take her all around Seattle as well as the V.U. campus, I wanted to kiss her under Olde Litterman Tree. It's said that if a couple kisses under that tree, they'll be together forever. I didn't need some old folk lore to make any promises to me, but still, the thought was nice. And Bella would think it was sweet.

I pulled out my phone._ Hey, are you upset with me for not calling? You have every right to be. I'd understand you know. Just please Bella, give me a call back ok? Love you._

In my A.P. science class, Mr. Wisers had us experimenting with the independent and dependent variables. I had already learned this stuff from high school, and so had Amber, so mostly we just talked and got to know each other a little better.

"You'd like Emmett. You two would be like this." I twisted my fingers together, showing her literally how close they would become.

"I'm sure he'd have some good ideas about football." She mused. "I bet his girlfriend....Rosalie?" I nodded my head, glad she had gotten Rose's name right. Amber was paying attention. "Well, Rosalie must be a tough cookie to handle Emmett on a daily basis. From what I hear from you of course."

"Yeah, she's tough as nails that one. She has this look, and I'm not sure what it is but it will stop you in your tracks. Well, if Rosalie a tough cookie, then Bella's a fluffy marshmallow." I chuckled at my own joke.

"Who's Bella?" Amber asked. I was a little stunned at first. What did she mean, 'Who's Bella?' My world maybe. The I remembered I hadn't mentioned her yet to Amber. What was wrong with me. They most important person in my life and I hadn't told my new friend about her. How stupid of me to just assume everyone knew about my other half.

"Bella is my girlfriend." I said. "You'll meet her this weekend at our party. You'll like her, she's nice." Was that all I could really say about my Bella? That was a good, nice girl? She was so much more than that. She was everything. How does one go about describing their one true love?

"Nice?" Something about Amber's voice caught me off guard. It was almost...defensive?

"Yeah, I mean Bella is pretty much the nicest person I know. She's a real sweetheart." I stated, feeling like I was almost defending Bella to Amber, why...I wasn't sure.

"Well, I can't wait to meet her then." Amber's voice was back to normal, but suddenly she needed all of her attention to concentrate on our assignment, our converstiaon over.

* * *

After my dad of classes had ended, I headed to the parking lot just like I usually did. I was more than eager to finally end this day. It was ruined from the moment I had woken up. First, I had forgotten to call Bella. Second, she hadn't responded to any of text messages. And lastly Amber, my newest friend, had suddendly gone bipolar on me. I was having a bad day no dobut. No, not a bad day. A horrible rotten day.

Just as I cranked my car and fassened my seatbelt, a tiny knock on my window startled me. It was Amber, she looked cold and a little pissed off.

"Hey." I said to her, after I rolled my window down. "What's up?"

"My car won't start." She rolled her eyes. "Can you give me a lift? I just live off of Barnette street. It's not too far from here." Without hesitation, I allowed Amber to jump into the passenger seat adn we quickly spead down the freeway.

"Thanks for giving me a lift. I hate that car, but you know it's kind of like my baby. I just can't give it up." She had taken off her gloves and was using my car's heaters to warm her hands.

"No problem. But hey, if you don't mind, I need to stop at my apartment first. I need to check my messages." I told her and I exited the freeway, just a few more minutes til I was home to see if Jasper had spoken to Bella.

"Expecting a call?" She laughed, her voice almost sudicitive.

"Hope so." I answered honestly.

"Um, I know that face. What's up? Something wrong in paradise?" She asked.

"Hope not." I let out a large amount of air I hadn''t realzied I was holding. "I kind of messed up with Bella and I haven't heard from her all day." I couldn't shake the fear the roared through me. If Bella was upset, that meant it was on me to do all I could to make it up to her. Which was going to be difficult seeing as we don't live to close to each other as we did last year. Even so, how would I make it up to her? She wasn't a typical high school girl, thank goodness. Flowers and chocolates wouldn't do the trick. Bella was the type of girl that needed one on one time, which I loved but it was nearly impossibel to schedule 'phone dates' much less actual ones.

"I'm sure she'll come around." Amber said, breaking my concentration.

"I hope so." I answered. "But it's not like her to not call me."

"How long have the two of you been an item?" Amber asked.

"A little over half a year." I smiled. "We had a great summer.

"Whoa!" Amber's voice risen. "Wait a minute! Hold up! You too haven't even been together one full year?" Her voice, full of shock and disapproval took me off guard. "You talk as if you've been together for years."

"Amber you don't understand. Bella is the love of my life." I stated, no one would change that fact.

"But you are so young. How do you know that?"

I was beginning to get a little outraged. How could someone I had once thought of as a pretty cool person judge me so quickly? "Bella is all I'm ever going to want in life. I know that."

Amber didn't say anything else on the matter, so I took it the subject was dropped. Although I was sure she'd bring it up again at a later date. I still couldn't understand the meaning behind her questions. Maybe she had never found love as I had found Bella. Amber could not understand our relationship because she had never been loved first hand. That had to be it.

"You can stay in the car if you'd like," I parked my car and took out my keys. The gentleman side of me wanted to invite her in, to offer her something to drink, but I was still pretty pissed at her acusations from earlier.

"No, I'd liked to come up if that's alright with you?" She must have noticed how my mood had changed. I wasn't exactly my usual, polite self. I shrugged my shoulders, and with that, Amber stepped out of my car and we both headed to my apartment.

* * *

**So orginally, I had BPOV in this chapter but it's too long so I decided to make a whole new chapter out of it. And for all of you that are STILL waiting for a scene with both E & B, you won't have to wait much longer! LOL Next chapter the lovely couple will finally reunite! **

**Special thank you to the two most quienue young ladies in Miami. T&T. **


	7. To Stop the Bleeding

**WARNING! Spellcheck isn't working so don't make nasty comments or reviews ok?**

**To Stop the Bleeding**

**BPOV**

The cold air filled by lungs violentally...I didn't care. The light drizzle from the Seattle rain hit my face, turning my skin to ice...I didn't care. I pushed my legs to carry me up the last flight of stairs, damn Edward's apartment building for not having an elevator. I was too stunned to cry. Too stunned to even think striaght. It was a miracle I had drove all the way to Seattle, managing to get here in one piece. I wasn't really sure why, in a time of Jacob's need, that I ran straight to Edward. I knew that Jacob needed me right now, probably more than he needed his idoit friends or even his dad. What Jacob needed was me.

I had spent six hours in the hospital after school watching Jacob sleep. All sorts of things rushed in my head. Was he in pain? Would he recover? What the hell was he thinking? Finally, after getting bored watching his breathing machine go up and down, then up and down once more, he finally woke up.

"Go home Bella." He told me, his voice rough so I begged him not to speak.

"I'm fine. No worries." He had said. Sure, no worries. He was having a damn machine breathing for him and he had both legs broken, but no worries?

"Jacob," I was going to tell him I had no where else to be, I was going to tell him I wanted to be at his side. But the truth was, I did have somewhere else I wanted to be. I wanted to be with Edward. He was the only person who could make this all make sence. And as much as I loved Jacob, the sight of him lying still on a hospital bed made me cringe.

So after bidding farwell to Jacob, after the 100th time he begged me to leave and go have some fun, I found myself in my truck, headed north to the one person in the whole wild world that really mattered. Edward.

I knocked twice on his apartment door, and stood as a very cold breeze flooded his hallway. I started to shiver, and wrapped myself with my jacket. I knocked again on his door, louder this time. If he were in his bedroom, he probably wasn't able to hear me. The weather took a violent turn then, almost frightening. The cold was brittle, it seems to prick my skin. My hands were no ice solid, no doubt I should have worn gloves. I reached into my pocket to whip out my cell phone. I was going to give Edward a call and tell him to answer his door, but my pockets were empty, no cell phone.

I mentally slapped myself for not having my phone. I realized just then I had left it at home. I banged again on his door, not even Jasper was home. Surely, someone would have heard me by now.

The cold was getting unbarable and dispite my stubburness, my mind started to think about not so pleasant things. The cold for one. How it felt now and how it must have felt to Jacob in the roaring waters of La Push. My lungs stinging with every breath I took and how Jacob must not have been able to breath as he was nearly drowning...

I sank to the hallway floor, and pulled me knees to my chin. I hadn't realized I was shaken, from both the cold and the thoughts running wild in my head. I hung my head low, wishing with all my might the rain and wild wind would stop and shift into a new direction, a direction not facing me.

My breathing became heavier as I continued to shake and although I tried to fight it off with no avail, I started to cry.

I cried for Jacob, I cried for the pain he was in.

I cried for the cold, who was fastly slapping me with gush after gush.

Then, I cried for myself. I finally had let my situation with Edward get the best of me. I was a stupid little girl for thinking this long distance relationship would work out. Just one week into school and he's already forgotten about me. How many times had he told me he loved me? Too many to count, so it must have been true. God only knows how much I love him. But why hadn't he called when he said he would? Edward and I had never had a fight, and I certainly didn't want to start one over something as simple as a forgotten phone call, but as a girlfriend, where did I draw the line? A forgotten phone call could quickly turn into a forgotten weekend get together. A week without talking could turn into a month. Before you know it, weeks could go by and you simple realize you aren't a couple anymore.

I didn't want that to happen to me and Edward.

I wouldn't let that happent to me and Edward.

"Bella?" I could hear his voice now, almost as if he was near. My sobbing hushed every other noise around me, I couldn't hear much besides my own heart beat, frantic as it was.

"Bella!" I heard from a distance. I raised my head just a slight, but a rush of cold air hit my cheek so I quickly barried and head once more. "Bella!" The voice, closer now and deep with anxiety. I mentally noted that this voice was famaliar and safe to me, but the cold was just too much and the thought about Jacob and Edward were still swirling in my head, I was too far lost to even think about anything else.

Something warmn touched my arm at the same time I heard a girl ask, "Is she ok?"

The girls voice brought me to alarm, surely I had never heard it before. I wanted to know who this girl was but the warmth that was on my arm was now spreading throughout my entire body. The cold floor underneath me disappeared, as Edward wrapped me in his arms.

"Oh, Edward." I cried. Everything was just too much to handle right now. I was so happy to be safe in his arms, the world started to disappear. No probelms, no worries. Just me and Edward.

"Open the door, here are my keys." His voice gave orders without being rude or demanding. He was still upset, I could tell by the undertone of his voice.

"It's ok Bella. I'll get you inside." He whispered in my ear. It was then did I realize that my crying wasn't as settle as I thought it was. I was shaking, and my breaking was riggid. I was having an emotional break down.

I had never had issues with anxiety. Even last spring when all that mess had happened with James, even then I did not feel as I felt just now.

I felt out of control. Like my body did not belong to me. So I did the only thing I knew how to do. I held onto Edward. And he held back.

"I'll go find a blanet." The girl said as she left the room. My mind quickly snapped back into place as Edward sat me down on his sofa.

I stood up at once. "How was that!" I ordered.

"Bella," Edward tried to force me down on his sofa again, but my will and determination out won his strength. "That is a friend of mine."

"A friend." I was outraged. A freakin friend! "Right." I rolled my eyes.

"Bella, are you ok?" He asked, his eyes trying to force me to look at him. I couldn't meet his eyes. Too much had happened in just a week's time...where was I to begin.

"I was just cold." I lied.

"No, I've never seen you like this." His hands were rested on my shoulders, but he quickly moved them to the sides of my face, positioning me so I would have to meet his sight. "What happened?" He ordered.

"It's..." The crying started again and no matter what this new chick's business was with Edward, I couldn't control from throwing myself at him, clinging to him as I cried uncontrollably. "He," I cried. I wanted to tell him about what had happened to Jacob, but my mouth wouldn't work right. My breath caught in my throat, my voice lost.

"Shhh...it's ok Bella." Edward guided our bodies down to the sofa once more. This time, I did not fight him to stand. "Just calm down alright? Gees," He rubbed my arms after taking off my frozen jacket. "You're ice solid Bella. How long were you out there?"

"Just..." I continued to sob. "Just awhile...I guess."

"Here's a blanket." The chick came into the living room. Edward's arms unwound themselves from my waist and then quickly returned as he wrapped the blanket around me. "Did you want me to get her something to drink. Hot chocolate maybe?" She asked Edward. Why couldn't this chick talk to me? Was there some special rule that she could only speak to Edward? Huh. I didn't like her already.

"That would be nice, thank you." Edward said, pleasently.

After a few moments of listening to Edward's heartbeat, I finally began to calm down. It did help that the chick in question wasn't in my eye sight. "Who is she again?" I asked.

"Amber." Edward answered. "She's my science partner and my new friend. I think you'd like her a lot too." He continued to rub circles on my back.

"Oh." I didn't want to tell him what I was really thinking. That he had already found a new girlfriend. I couldn't tell him things like that. This only upset him, it was almost as if I didn't trust Edward, which everyone knew I completely did.

Edward read something in my silence. "She's just a friend Bella. No worries."

Worries? Wasn't it just Jacob who had told me not to worry. "Jacob." I breathed, remembering why I had driven all the way to Seattle to see Edward in the first place.

"What bout Jacob?" Edward asked, his voice alarmed. He sat up on the sofa and positioned himself so his eyes met mine.

"He's hurt." I said, my voice even, unemotional despite how I was really feeling about the situation. "He's in the hospital." I told Edward all about what had happened to Jacob, his friends daring him to jump from that stupid cliff. Jacob being stupid to agree to it. Edward agreed whole heartly that Jacob was indeed, an idoit which made me laugh. Which made Edward smile. I apoligized for showing up unannocuced. Edward shook his head in protest, but I wouldn't let him let me get away with it.

"No really, I should have called or something. It was wrong of me to just barge up here. But I just, needed you." I blushed. Edward ran his finger over my blazing cheek and then gave me a guinue smile.

"I'm sorry for forgetting to call you the other morning, and then sorry for not calling you that night." He mummered, his voice soft. I could tell he really was sorry, and I mentally smacked myself for even allowing myself to think such horrible reason for him not calling.

"I was worried." I told him.

"I'm sorry about that too." He shook his head. "I guess we need to readjust this whole longdistance thing. I'm not sure about you, but I could barley manage this week without you. It feels so good to have you in my arms again." I nodded, because I didn't have to tell him I felt the same way he did, he already knew. Edward and I were connected on such a level, half the time I didn't understand it myself.

His lips, just inces from mine, I wanted them so bad. They were pink and smooth and full and soft. I knew everything there was to know about his lips. I knew how they felt against mine and I knew it was total extacty. I knew how they felt against my neck too. Pure heaven.

I moved in closer, ready for an overdue kiss from his adorable lips.

"Here is your hot chocolate Bella." Amber walked into the room carrying a small coffee cup with hot, brown liquid steaming out of it. It did smell pretty good, I had to give her credit for that at least.

"Thanks." I said, as I let the warmth of my hot cooca warm my hands. "I'm Bella." I smiled, despite the not so nice things I was thinking about her.

"Oh," She chuckled. "I know." Seriously, who says that? What a way to introduce yourself to your new friend's girlfriend! How rude.

"Bella heard some awful news about a friend of ours." Edward told her, not that it was any of her business to begin with.

"That's awful." Amber ploped down on Edward recliner. Like I said, rude. "Do you mind if I use your phone to call a tow truck? I don't want to leave my car on campus all night."

"Sure." Edward nodded to the kitchen were the phone must have been. "Help yourself."

He turned to me, "Drink up." He ordered but I had other plans. I sat my cocoa down on his coffee table then, with my newly warmed hands, grabbed his face and brought it to mine.

This kiss was so different. I felt as if I was kissing him like I hadn't seen him in ages. My body worked with his in perfect harmony. Our lips, moved together like they were made for one another. His kissing was warm and gentle. I imagine he was taking it easy on me seeing as I just had a mental breakdown.

"Oh sorry." Amber came into the room, embrassed to have caught Edward and I in such a personal moment.

"I love you." Edward told me, his eyes blazing. He didn't care that Amber was right behind him, watching us.

"Yeah." I breathed and smiled like an idoit. Edward laughed so hard that it was contagious. In a matter of minutes, I went from total freak show having a nervous break down in the rain to a 13 year old school girl, giggling like something special was added to my brownies. Only Edward this sort of power over me. Only him.

"I'm glad you came." He told me, still not paying attention to Amber. "I don't think I could have waited til tomorrow to see you at the party. It's nice to have you here." Edward's arms crushed me to his side, I fit just right. It was my spot.

"I'm glad I came too." I told him, honestly.

"The tow truck should only take a few minutes. Then I'll be out of your hair." Amber flopped back down on the recliner. 'Make yourself at home' I said mentally. "You guys want to watch some tv?"

Amber flipped through the channels like she owned the damn place. But I was too busy snuggling up to Edward to notice.

* * *

**EPOV**

Amber's tow truck had came right on time. Shee bid me farwell and then quickly darted out the door, without even saying goodbye to Bella. That was rude, but I let it slide. I was too happy at the moment to let anything get to me. Bella was here. In my apartment. With me. Alone. Hadn't I wanted this from the very beginning? I changed the channel from whatever the hell Amber was watching, to a more suited music channel. Soft jazz. Bella had taken off her socks and shoes and was wrapped up nicely on the sofa, a take out menu in hand.

"We have to order cheesecake." She said, still reading from the menu. "Tonight is a night in which cheesecake is defanitly needed and well, deserved."

"Cheesecake it is then." I took my seat next to her once more. "But I'd like it if you'd have a hot meal, espically after you were out in that cold weather." Bella nodded, agreeing with me for once about her health care. "I'm sorry I don't have much here. Jasper and I never really are here to eat a meal." Bella had raider our fridge and when she it found less to her liking, she hit up the cabinets. They were empty as well and that did not suit her at all.

"You have to go get some groceries." She demanded. "What if the two of you were to get snowed in? Huh? What would you eat then?" And I had to admit she had a point.

"Brocolli and cheese soup sounds pretty good." Bella read from the menu once more. "It would warm me up. How about we share an order of fries too?"

"Yeah sure, fries." I said, not really paying attention. The sight of Bella on my sofa, completely confertable in her surroundings made my heart soar. It must had been fate when I walked into that music store oh so many months ago and saw her. Fate.

"What are you thinking about?" She asked, her voice soft.

"The day I met you." I smiled at her and at the memory. "You were the most beautiful thing I had ever seen."

"Were?" She laughed. "WERE the most beautiful thing you had ever seen?" She teased. "What about now." She squard her shoulders, in an attempt to make me laugh. "What do you think about me now?"

I moved a piece of hair out of her face, slowly so that my fingers could brush her cheek, her neck...

"You amaze me everytime I see you." I said as I inched my way closer to her. "Your shiny hair," I looped my finger around one of her curls. It bounced back into place. "Your skin...so soft and warm." I traced my fingers along her jawline, lingering by her earlob. Her breath caught. "Your lips, and how they remind me of cotton candy." She licked her lips in response, "and then there is your eyes." Her eyes met mine and it was like a blind man seeing the sun for the first time. "I love you." I swore.

"I love you too Edward." Her eyes, sparkling. It reminded me of the shore down in La Push. The light cascading off the water. It was beautiful. Bella was beautiful.

"Do you have any idea how much you mean to me?" I laughed, but really the question was real.

Instead of answering me, she let her lips do the talking. That was fine by me. Her kisses, so gentle and smooth. My hands ran up and down her spine, easing her so that her form was turned to jello under me. I moved us so I was on top of her, my hand behind her head so that when she slid down on the couch, she'd be comfortable. Bella wrapped her right leg around my waist, and in doing so, I began to think maybe this would be the night she and I would finally expression our love to one another.

I kissed down to her neck as her hands moved and tugged on my hair. It was the most pleasurable feeling in the entire world. I couldn't take it much longer, my lips needed hers. So I kissed her, hard and urgent this time. If my earlier words hadn't expressed exactly how I felt, surely by body language was doing it now.

"Did you have protection?" Bella asked, half dazed.

I froze.

I didn't have protection, and her voice, soft and warm and full of love. How could I do this to her? How could I just take advantage of her like this? She clearly came to me upset because of Jacob and I was about to do something with her and I wasn't even sure she was ready.

"Bella," I rose from on top of her. She understood immediatleyly what was happening. One look into my eyes, and she knew.

She closed her blouse, covering herself. I hadn't realized my hands had already started to undress her.

"What's wrong?" She started to tear up. I was turely a monster.

I shook my head. "Not like this. Not now."

"But why?" She cried now, hurt. She was defantly hurt.

"Bella, you deserve so much better than this." I threw my hands into the air, geasturing to my messy apartment. "You deserve candles and a big cozy bed with thick blankets and fluffy pillows. Anything but this. Not like this." I stood from the sofa, too much of a coward to even meet her eyes. "Bella, I'm sorry."

"Yeah," She wiped her face, her eyes still spilling tears.

"Call the food in, I'll go get my wallet." I turned from the sofa, turned from Bella. I couldn't bare to deal with the pain and hurt in her eyes. Had she not the slightest idea what she meant to me? I couldn't just take advantage her like that. The situation was horrible. I was horrible. I had made so many mistakes this week, I was digging a whole, a deep one with no way out.

* * *

**Hum....intresting. Longest chapter ever! (for me at least.) Tell me what you guys think ok? Next chapter up tomorrow, BPOV.**

***Who out there can correctly guess what's going on with Amber? Hint...it's not what you think.***


	8. Connection

**Connection**

**BPOV**

The sun came in from the east, awakening me with a light glare through the curtains. Not my curtains. Edward's curtains. I knew for sure because I had been the one to help pick them out. I tilted my head up, and sure enough a sleeping Edward was right there. It dawned on me just then that I was in a bed with Edward. I guess I should have been excited but the memories from the previous night were still fresh in my memory.

He had pushed me away.

I wasn't sure why, something about it not being right. I knew Edward too well and I could really see his side in the matter. A big bed with champagne and chocolate covered strawberries. It would be romantic. But honestly it didn't matter if we were at the Ritz or even in the back of Tyler's van, as long as I was with Edward, it would have been right.

My eyes were swollen, a sure sign of all my of crying from the day before. So many emotions all mixed together. Too many of them to tell the difference now. How was it possible to feel so much in just one day?

I didn't want to think about Jacob just yet. I didn't want to think about how stupid he had been or about the pain he was in. So I turned my attention back to the man sleeping beside me, his arms wrapped around me so I was tucked up nice and tidy next to him. His chest, raising and falling in perfect rhythm. I counted his breathing, in and out. In and out. His body was warm so I snuggled up next to him. It didn't matter to me that he didn't think we were ready as a couple to take that next step.

I was ready.

Last night, after Edward had returned from his bedroom with his wallet, cash in hand, they had watch old reruns to 'I Love Lucy'. They were funny, but I couldn't laugh. So I pretended to be interested, and sat happily next to Edward's side, enjoying our french fries. The cheesecakes stored away in the fridge, forgotten.

The last thing I remembered was Edward carrying me to his room, my hands squeezing his shirt, begging not to let go. He kissed me forhead and whipsered he loved me, soon after that, I was out cold.

Granted I didn't like the reason for my visit in the fist place, I would have like to visit Edward on good terms, I was glad, none the less, to have came all the way up to Seattle. Nothing could compare to waking up to him. I wanted to wake up to him every morning for the rest of my life. And if I had it my way...I'd be doing just that.

"You're so soft." He whispered, tracing my side with his hand. I didn't realize he had awoken, I was too far gone thinking about our future together.

"I didn't mean to wake you." I snuggled down closer to him so that my body was pressed firmly next to his.

Edward wrapped his arms around me even tighter, as if it were possible, then he kissed my nose. The hurt from the privous night, forgotten. He opened his eyes right then, as he looked back into my own, I could see the real him. He DID want better for me than just some crappy couch. He did want to have this right for me, even if his idea of right was completely differnt from my own.

"Sorry about last night." He whispered.

I shook my head, letting him know he was already forgiven. "You were right. It wasn't the best time for us to do something like that." I bit my lip. "I'm glad you stopped me."

"Ha!" Edward laughed one hard, edgy chuckled. "You don't know the restraint it took to stop myself!" He laughed out again. I laughed with his this time, my mood was lifted from such a great night sleep. I'd have to get one of these mattress for myself. I'd have to get Charlie to help heave it up the stairs to my bedroom.

"Charlie!" I screamed, I could only imagine the news channels right now, my face blasted from FOX, CNN and NBC morning news stations. I could read the headlines now, 'Fork teen still missing after an all night search. Police say, the search will last all weekend.' "Edward! Charlie is going to freak out!" I jumped out of bed, without falling or stumbling, and wildly search his bedroom for a phone. "I have to call him, let him know I'm ok. He's probably freaking out. OMG! And then, after he finds out I'm ok, he'll probably ground me for the rest of my life. UH! This sucks!" I whipped my head to the living room, I had all but given up searching for his cell phone, so I'd just have to use the main line. "Edward! Help me!" I called, but instead of hearing the sheets move as he sprung from the bed, all I heard was his chuckles. "Edward Anthony Cullen! Are you laughing?" I glared at him. "This is so not funny! You'll be in trouble too! Charlie will ring you by the neck if he finds out...."

Edward cut me off, "Alice called him last night and told him the two of you were having a sleepover. Everything is fine. No one is in trouble."

"Really?" I exhaled deeply then plopped down on his sofa. "You should really tell me things like that." I half joked. "Otherwise I'll probably end up having a heart attack."

Edward sat down next to me and pulled me to his side. "You know, next year we won't have to worry about things like that."

"Yeah, right Edward." I tucked my legs under me and sat up straight on the sofa. "I'll be living in the dorms, with RA's. From what I hear, they are horrible. Curfew, strict laws about who can enter your room after certain hours."

"Laws?" Edward wiggled his eyebrows, humored at my taste in wording.

"Yes, laws. Did you know they can kick me out of my dorm if I get into too much trouble? That's crazy!"

"Hey Bella!" Jasper came into the living room, looking as if if were still in sleep mode. "I thought I heard you out here." Jasper came over to me and kissed me forehead while I gave him a half-ass hug. "Whatcha been up to girl?" He asked as he sat on the opposite chair from the sofa.

"Jacob Black got himself beat up pretty bad. Poor kid." Edward told him, as he wound his arm back around me, pulling me closer to his side.

"That kid is reckless." Jasper shook his head, "What happened exactly?"

As Edward explained to Jasper what had happened to Jacob, I made myself useful and went to the kitchen to start breakfast. Well, toast with jelly really, seeing as the two of them didn't have so much as a frying pan. I was just getting three mugs down for coffee as Edward came into the kitchen.

"I'm headed to the grocery store, I'll be right back." He kissed my cheek. "I'd invite you to go, but it's pretty nasty out there and after last night," He trailed off. "I really don't want you back in that weather."

"Works for me." I giggled. "Besides, I'm too damn spoiled to your toasty-warm apartment to ever leave."

Then Edward gave me a look that I have never seen before. A look in which was filled with such emotion, it nearly shook my entire being. His eyes were dark, but not dangerous. He breathing slowed and deepened. I was motionless as well, until he smiled my favorite crocked smile that I loved so much.

"My home is your home." He said, then headed out the front door. And for a brief moment, I felt as if he was asking me to move in with him.

"So Bella?" Jasper came into the kitchen, probably because he smelled the brewing coffee. Leave it to Jasper to spoil a damn moment for me. "You staying for the party tonight? A bunch of students are coming, I want everyone to meet Alice. As I'm sure Edward wants to show you off too." Jasper joked, and knocked his hip with mine.

"Will Amber be there." I whispered, still staring at the front door, awaiting Edward's return.

"Amber? Oh yeah...yeah that chick from Edward's class. Yeah, she'll be there. Why?" He asked.

"Good, I'm glad she's coming. There is something I want her to see." I said. Then took a sip of my coffee, still staring at the door.

* * *

**Next Chapter is EPOV of the party. Drama w/ Amber....many have guessed but no one has gotten it right so far. What the hell is up with that chick?**


	9. Amber Alert

**Amber Alert**

**EPOV**

"And you know, cucumbers are a fruit." The sales associate huffed and blew her bangs out of her face. "Since they have seeds and all. So are tomatoes. A lot of people don't know that." She seemed pretty damn proud of herself, sharing this information with me. I, of course, already knew about the secret lives of fruits and veggies.

"Is that so." I turned swiftly, as if by doing so I would relay to her that I was in much too big of a rush to discuss vegetables. Bella was here...in Seattle. I wasn't going to waste anytime not being with her, but seeing as we might starve do to the lack of edible food in mine and Jasper's apartment, I figured a shopping trip was what I needed. Bella stayed back at the apartment of course, what kind of a boyfriend would I be if I had her out in this weather?

Thinking of Bella back in my apartment, awaiting some decent cooking indigrents, ready to make a good, heart-filled meal, it sent shivers up my spine. I was never a man that had issues with commitment. I love the idea of spending my whole life with just one person, I didn't realize however, that you have to have the right kind of relationship what that said person. What Bella and I had, well it was much more.

As I picked out the brightest oranges and plumpest grapes, I got to thinking about what it would really be like if Bella and I lived together. Not boyfriend/girlfriend, but husband and wife. Before the thought fully imprinted into my head, a pair of soft, small hands covered my eyes from behind me.

"Since when the hell do guys eat fruit?" She said.

I chuckled quietly. "Aren't you suppose to say, 'Guess who?""

"Oh yeah, right." She huffed. "Guess who?"

"Is it Octomom?" I laughed.

The hands removed themselves at once. "What the fuck ever Cullen!" Amber play smacked my back, then I turned around to look her in the eye. "Does it look like I just popped out god freakin 8 kids?"

I did a once over on her body. "Nope, guess not." I laughed.

"Funny." She teased. "Hey," She looked around the store for half a second. "Where's the chick from your apartment? You're not ditching her are you?" Although her comment was suppose to be funny, I found it insulting. Was it me, or was she taking a stab at Bella?

"Um, she's still at my apartment." I answered and got back to my grocery shopping, trying hard to stay in 'gentlemen mode'. "And her name is Bella, remember?"

"Oh right, _Bella. _Look I wanted to talk to you about that." She bit her lip, Bella-style.

"_That _is my girlfriend, you know what Amber," So much for controlling my emotions, I liked Amber as a friend, but the way she spoke about Bella...well it was really starting to tick me off. If Amber was really a friend of mine, wouldn't she see how important Bella is to me? Wouldn't she understand just how much Bella means to me? "Whatever problem you have with Bella you can just get it off your chest right no...."

"That's not what I was getting at." Amber cut me off. "I mean, you're free to like whom you like."

"I'm free to love whom I love, you mean." I corrected.

"Yeah, _love." _Amber seemed to cringe away from the word _love,_ like it was tainted or something.

"Look, I'm sorry Edward, it's just that....ok, I'm just going to come out and say it...."

"Yes, please do. I'm dying to hear what you think." I spit. Honestly, what the hell was with her? First, how on Earth could someone be so damn funny and outgoing one minute, then turn into a total bitch another? Secondly, was it even humanly possible not to like Bella? She was such a sweetheart that I couldn't even imagine someone not taking to her.

"She's all wrong for you." Amber spit out, it was a low blow.

"Excuse me?" I whispered, awed at what she had just told me.

"Bella." Amber shook her head. "Bella is all wrong for you and as a friend I thought I should tell you now, before things get out of hand. I wouldn't want you going any further in a relationship with _that girl _when you could do so much better." She bit her lip again, and in doing so, it only made me angrier. "Just know that when it all comes crashing down, I'm here for you Edward. I'll always have your back, I'm a good friend."

After her little rant, I just stood there, in the middle of the carrots and vitamin water, and looked at her like she was speaking a different language. Was she speaking English? If so, what in the world kind of hoop-la was she talking about? Bella, not right for me? As if. If anything, Bella could do better. Much fucking better.

"I think it's time that I leave." I sat my groceries down, right there in the middle of the store then turned and headed towards the exit.

"If you know what's good for you Edward, you'll dump her before she gets to you!" Amber called to me, "Look!" She yelled after I didn't respond. "I'm just trying to do you a favor, as a friend." She told me.

I turned slowly to glare at her. If I were any less of a man, I would have gotten violent. No. I take that back. I would never hit a woman. I wasn't _James. _"If you are really a friend of mine Amber," I paused letting her ears settle on what I had to say, "You won't ever talk to me again. And if you can't at least do that, if you want to know what's good for you, you'll never talk ill of Bella Swan again, understood?" I didn't wait to hear her response, I jetted straight to my car, angry and frustration pumping my veins.

I headed home, back to Bella, with no groceries in hand and anger in my heart. What a great way to kick off my weekend with Bella. Fan-fucking-tastic.

* * *

**BPOV**

Apparently, Edward and Jasper were hosting some sort of a Halloween party, although it was not that time of year. I'd never understand just how girls could wear so much freakin makeup! Come on!

"One chick," I told Alice, "I sware, she had the most horrible fake eye lashes on!"

"It's not possible to have horrible fake eye lashes." Alice corrected me.

"No really, Alice." I contradicted. "Whenever she blinked, it was like she was my own personal fan."

"Where. Is. My. Bella!!!!!!" Rosalie jumped out from behind a door and squeezed me so tight it was nearly impossible to breath.

"Rosalie!" I cheered when she let go. "Oh my gosh it's so good to see you!" It was now my turn to squeeze her.

"And Alice!" Alice jumped in our three-sum hug. "Don't forget about 'The Alice'." We all laughed.

"Yes, yes yes." Rosalie rolled her eyes while giving Alice a much needed hug. "I have missed you too you little freak." She joked.

"How is everything going Rosalie?" I asked. "It seems like forever since we've talked!"

"It has been forever since we've talked." She joked, and hugged me once more. "Everything is going good." She explained as she let go of me. "Modeling is going good, it keeps me busy which means I have more green in the bank." She mocked twirled her hair, as if she did the modeling for the cash. "Oh, and OMG Emmett! I can't stand living with him!"

"What?" I froze. "Why not?"

"He's freakin a slob! I'm am not his freakin babysitter!" She shook her head. "But it is nice having him around to help with the heavy lifting...and I pretty much get sex whenever I want."

"Rosalie!" I play smacked her arm. "I don't want to hear that stuff!"

"Well, I think it's fabulous." Alice said.

"You think everything is fabulous." I reminded her.

"Tube tops, dark chocolate, barking dogs, the names, 'Melissa', 'Tess', and 'Natalie'."

"Ok, ok!" I begged her to stop. "So you don't think everything is fabulous."

"Are you excited about moving in with Edward next year?" Rosalie asked, and her question really had taken me by surprise.

"Um....what?" Was all I could say. What did she mean, 'Move in with Edward'? Hadn't I told her that I was moving to a dorm room for my first semester? Me, move in with Edward, nice idea but I didn't know if that was really what I wanted, so soon I mean. For crying out loud! I had just turned 18! And, really, was that what Edward wanted?

"You. Moving. In. With. Edward? I thought you would be counting down the days. I mean, come on! How much easier would it be for the two of you to hook up if you didn't have to worry about curfew or your dad...." Rosalie trailed off.

"Actually, Rosalie...Edward and I, don't actually...you know....we haven't yet....well we've never..."

"No freakin way!" Rosalie screeched, and about 5 bimbos looked over at us. My mind drifted for just a second as I realized that way too many people were here. Where did they all come from?

"What's the matter babe?" Emmett, suddenly right behind Rosalie, pulled his big arms around her waist and then kissed (sucked) her neck. Nasty. "Oh hey Bella! Nice seeing you here. How's school? ALICE!" He cheered her name. "What's up little pumpkin."

"Don't touch my hair." Alice warned him. "Actually Emmett, us girls were on the verge of a MAJOR breakthrough over here." Alice clarified. "Right before you came up."

"Oh well," He ruffled her hair despite her warning, "guess I'll catch up with you guys later." Emmett kissed Rosalie on the cheek and then went back to nursing his beer along side a few of his buddies.

I took a deep breath and then looked Rose and Alice in the eye. Alice was the first to speak.

"Do you mean to tell me that you've never actually done...." She shook her head.

"Omg! Alice! I can't talk about this with you!" I whined, I know, like a damn 4 year old.

"Why the hell not?" Alice looked taken back, I must have hurt her feelings. "I'm your best friend!"

"It's not that Alice, it's just..."I huffed, trying to find good wording. "He's your brother. You're not grossed out?" I asked.

"Not at all." She answered honestly.

"What are you waiting for?" Rosalie wondered. "You guys love each other right?" I nodded, telling her 'yes'. "So what's the hold up?" She questioned.

"It's just." I took a good look around the living room of Jasper and Edward's apartment, taking note of all the people that were in ear shot of my voice. "Can we talk about this somewhere else? Maybe Edward's room?"

I lead the way down the hall, passing a few hoes by the way, into Edward's room. Edward and Jasper's apartment had two master suites, each was spacious with walk in closets, fireplaces and private baths. Talk about living in luxury. I closed to door behind us, as Rosalie sat on the edge of Edward's bed, and Alice plopped into his lounge chair that was facing the largest window.

"Ok, Bella." Rosalie said. "Talk."

And so I did. I told my two very best friends just everything that had went on. I told them about school, about how much sitting next to freakin Jessica Swank was bothering me. I told them about Jacob and how he had gotten hurt. I told them about how lost and alone I had been feeling and the night I had came to Edward's apartment to find him with Amber. I told them that I tried to be with Edward that night, to 'seal the deal' but Edward wasn't having it. They agreed with Edward's decision. It was, as they say, 'The wrong place at the wrong time'. They also told me not to worry about Amber. "That's another name I don't like." Alice said.

And some 1 and 1/2 hours later, my two very best friends and I emerged from my boyfriend's bedroom, laughing with giggles...my worries forgotten, until I walked into the living room, and saw the look on Edward's face.

**A/N: Like it? Still can't figure out what's up with Amber? Hum...well there are several hints in this chapter. Brownie points to whomever gets it right. **


	10. Plans Forgotten

**EPOV**

The voices came from everywhere, it took just a second for me to comprehend that more people had came to our party then was originally attended. I hoped we wouldn't get in trouble form our neighbors.

"Where's the food?" Emmett's voice bombed, somewhere from across the room.

"Everything alright?" Jasper, his voice, always calm and reassuring.

"Hey there." Some chick...she didn't matter.

Out of all these voices, the only one that really meant something to me, was the one that wasn't speaking. Bella, stopped dead in her tracks when she saw me come in the apartment. She did that cute Bella-thing where she bit her lip, then shook her head as if she were fighting off her own personal negative thought, then looked me in the eye and started walking towards me.

I'd always remember this moment, not because of how Amber had pissed me off so badly. No, nothing she could say or do could ruin this moment for me. Bella's warm hand in mine, her simple smile. They way she didn't even have to ask if something was wrong. Not only did she know I was in a bad mood, but she knew well enough not to ask any questions or give me grief about the many groceries I was suppose to return home with. This was _my_ Bella.

"Rosalie says, that I have the look and charm of a hair model." Bella tells me, as her hand fits snugly into my own. "I'm not sure how I feel about it." She admits.

"Is that right?" I ask, trying to regain some control of my emotions. I know Bella is not serious about the modeling thing, she's just trying to ease some of my tension, love her.

"Yeah, that's right." Then her smile went wide and I knew I was in for a good laugh. "And she thinks that if I could ever master the fine art of 'Walking in Heels', lingerie modeling would be my next step."

"You, walking? In heels?" I joked. "Sorry sweetheart, but I don't think that's the path your life is going to take." It worked, Bella had successfully made me feel all better.

"Rats!" She mocked being disappointed. "Guess I'll starve then."

"Yeah, guess so." I kissed her good then, as both a way to tell her 'thank you' for understand me so deeply and as a reward for being so damn sweet.

"Yo, Yo, Yo! I'm am HERE! The party can begin!"

"Jacob Black!" Bella screamed, breaking our kissed while our hands were still connection. "What are you doing out of bed!? You little twerp! You're going to get yourself killed!"

"Ah, Bella!" Jacob looked around my apartment living room, taking note of the everyone who watched him limp in with crutches. "Pipe it down! Gees." Jacob limped a few feet to where Bella and I were standing. "This is a college party. I couldn't miss it. Besides," He gave me a pat on the back.

"Hey Jacob." I told him.

"I just had to see what the hell this idiot has been up to." Jacob nodded towards me.

"Let me guess," I joked with him. "I'm the idoit?" I laughed.

"The one and only."

"How so?" I asked, Bella still visibly upset that Jacob was up and about so quickly after his injuries. I, on the other hand, thought Jacob strong.

"Well, ok here it is dude. You leave Forks to come chill in Seattle with no hot chicks," Jacob looks around the room. "Ok, SOME hot chicks to go to stupid smarty-pants school?"

"Jake...." Bella trailed off. She blushed, but not the kind I like to see on her. She looked down at the floor, sorry for whatever emotion was running through her mind right now.

"Sore subject Jacob. But thanks for giving me your opinion on how my life is going."

"I'm just saying man." He gave Bella a quick hug, her eyes not leaving the floor. "Sorry Bella, really." Then Jacob was off to do whatever Jacob does at parties...who knows?

"Bella," I started, I was going to tell her it was going to be alright, or maybe take her to my room so we could have a quiet moment alone but then, and God strike me down if I'm lying, Amber's shrieking voice came from the front door.

"Hello fellow classmates!" She slurred, drunk. Just great! Could this weekend get any worse?

* * *

**BPOV**

"Come over here with me." I tugged on Edward's sleeve just as Amber started to make her rounds of the living room. Seeing her drunk made me feel anxious, for her being drunk was not apart of my plan for the evening. "Come on." I tugged again, Edward's eyes full of questions, but none the less, he did as he was told. He followed me to a corner of the living room which was not being used by what was sure to be the entire population of V.U.

I pushed him up against the wall, carefully, I didn't want to cause a scene...that and I knew I'd never actually be strong enough to actually 'push' Edward (or any other person for that matter) up against anything. "I want some alone time with you." I inched closer, my hands gripping at the collar of his shirt. "I've been so deprived." I bit my lip, innocence taking over.

"Bella?" He asked, his eyes which normally were warm and guinue, were now full of doubt. "What's going on with you?" He asked.

'What was going on with me?' I asked myself. Since when am I so pushy towards Edward? "I just wanted to have some alone time with you." I answered him.

"Alone time?" He questioned. "In a house full of strangers?"

Oh, well I guess he had a point. "Kiss me." I told him. Out the corner of my eye, I saw Amber start to edge closer and closer to us, Good. I wanted her to see this.

Edward's kiss was light, not nearly as deep and passionate as I would have hoped for. He pulled away too quickly and I could almost taste the accusations on his lips.

"Bella," He said my name cooly, "what are you up to?" Damn him for knowing me so well.

"Nothing." I lied, then blushed because I'm such a bad liar. Edward just shook his head, but not in the 'Bella-is-doing-something-cute' way. No, he was getting upset.

"Hey there!" Amber called, she had spotted us. "What's up my main man!" She jumped on Edward, knocking me out of the way. "How is the party goin so far?" She asked after she stumbled because Edward hadn't raised his arms to catch her after she nearly jumped his bones.

"Bella," He looked at me half stunned. "Let's get out of here." He demanded. And for the first time, I felt as if I didn't like where my time with Edward was heading.

"No, no, no." Amber said, then turned to me. "Oh don't be mad Bella. I was just telling him what I thought about you earlier and now he's all Mr. Cranky pants."

"What?" I asked, to both Amber and Edward.

"Don't worry about it, love." Edward said, not meeting my eyes. He reached for my arm and tried to turn me so that we could leave but I wasn't having any of that.

"He didn't tell you I saw him this morning at the store?" Amber said. I shook my head, a little confused. "Oh," she said, then took a long sip of her beer before explaining more to me. "I was trying to be a good friend that's all. I mean, he needs to know he has options right?"

"Options?" My voice, so small I could barley even hear myself.

"Bella, please. Let's leave." Edward was urging me.

"No." I said, meeting his eye. It was the first time I had actually used that tone of voice with Edward. I didn't like fighting in genreal, but fighting with Edward, it was just unimaginable. "I want to hear more about your options." I sneered.

"There are no other opitons Bella." Edward told me.

"Because you hold him back." Amber said, plain as day. She was bold, I had to give her that.

"That's enough." Edward told Amber. All the while, the party goers were drinking and laughing all around us. Unaware of the complete meltdown about to happen.

"I mean really," She said, "She's in freakin HIGH SCHOOL. What like she's gonna move here and you'll graduate together and you'll get married and have lots of little Eddies and Bellies? Is that right?"

I couldn't think of any words, and Edward was speechless beside me.

"Amber stop." Edward told her, anger in his voice.

"It's true." I whispered. "I hold you back."

"Bella, no you don't." Edward spoke, kinder, gentler now. "Of course you don't."

"But I do." Then, as the tears started to form in my eyes, I took his hand off of my arm and turned and exitied the party.

Edward didn't follow after me.

* * *

**I know, I ended on a sad note but what is a good story without a little bit of drama right? And again, for all of you that are like, "OMG Edward is going to leave Bella." No, hell no. None of my stories end like that. AND FOR THE LAST TIME, Edward does not like Amber in that way. He only has eyes for Bella.**

**I'm sorry to say that the drama does not end here. There is still a whole lot of a story left to be told.**


	11. Preview

**No excuses for me not updating besides the basics. I'm busy plus I'm super lazy. Sry. Here is a preview. **

**Preview:**

**EPOV**

Her eyes did not meet mine and that scared me so badly. How would I ever get past this point? If I could reach out to her....if I could just open my mouth, say something...SAY ANYTHING! Anything to make this moment better. Then it'd all be ok. Then she'd understand. We'd be ok.

"I'm just gonna," She whispered, and even from across the room, I could still hear her. Her voice cracked, and I wanted nothing more then for her to look at me. "Go." She said.

She didn't meet my eyes, she was intent on studying the floor. I had to go after her. I had to make this right again.

"I guess I shouldn't have kissed you." Amber sneered, from somewhere unimportant. "It was good though right?" She asked.

"You wish." I told her then headed out the door in the direction of my Bella.

**Yeah, yeah. Drama Drama Drama! What is up with this Amber chick? I promise you'll find out soon enough and NO...despite her behavior, she does not 'want' Edward.**


	12. TwoFaced

**To DANCELIFE450: Sorry about driving you nuts....lol Here is the update so you can rest freely.**

**TWO - FACED**

**BPOV**

It took all of two mintues before someone came calling after me. I wasn't as stupid to think my friends would just let me walk away. I knew someone would come, although I was secretly hoping it was Edward, and not Rosalie.

"Come back Bella." Rosalie called from behind me. "It's too cold and you're going to get lost." First, it wasn't all that cold, and secondly....ok the chances were that I was going to get lost but still, as a friend Rosalie should have a bit more faith in me.

"I just need some time to clear my head." I told her, hoping she'd go back to the party to enjoy herself. Fat chance, seeing as I had the most amazing friends in the whole wide world.

"Edward is worried about you." She said.

"Ha!" I laughed without humor. "Then why isn't he the one trying to get me back to the party? Why didn't he come after me?" I meant the question to be snotty, but really I was worried to why he was still at the party. What did this mean?

"Because I told him not too." I turned around in my tracks and glared at her. "Did it ever occur to you that this problem I'm having...this issue is between Edward and I?"

"Yes but he needed to go deal with Amber," I glared at the mention of her name. "So I told him I'd come bring you back to the party."

I couldn't walk much longer, despite my stubbornness, it was cold and if I didn't find shelter soon, I'd freeze to death. "I can't go back Rosalie." I said, my voice small with worry and stress.

"Why not?" She questioned. "Edward wants to talk to you." Silence. "You guys really have some stuff to talk about." She pointed out.

"Really? I hadn't noticed!" I yelled. "He won't sleep with me!" She opened her mouth to protest but I didn't give her the chance. "Everything Amber said was right! He can do so much better than me! It's ture Rosalie, I hold him back and not just because I'm in high school! I hold him back in everything!"

"Bella stop." She cried. "Listen to me ok?"

She waited a moment for me to cool down then continued, "Edward loves you. He wants you. You two are perfect for each other." She came closer to me and moved a piece of hair from my face, "Can't you see how special you are?"

"I don't think I can do this anymore." I confessed.

"Do what?" Rosalie questioned.

"This!" I raised my arms high in the sky. "Being Edward's girlfriend. It's just, I mean....."

"You want to break up with Edward?" Her horrid tone of voice caught me off guard and I quickly corrected my choice of words.

"It's not that I don't want to be with him, I do. I love him. It's just..." I scrambled my head for a good choice of words. Words that could express exactly how I was feeling.

I came up short.

"Let's just get back to the party ok." Rosalie hugged my shoulders. "Everything will be ok, I promise. Go talk to Edward, let him know how you feel. I'm sure you guys can work it out."

**EPOV**

"You shouldn't have said those things." I sneered through my teeth trying desperatley to control my anger.

"Why not?" Amber questioned as she ploped down on my sofa.

"Because they were not true."

"Maybe, maybe not. Listen Edward, I'm sure you think you're in love with Bella now but give it a few more months, and you'll start to see things clearly."

"Amber I am not about to explain my relationship with Bella to you."

"I was in love once." Amber said, taking a long look at her beer bottle in her hand, which was empty. "Ended badly. I wish I had a good friend to tell me that things don't always work out."

"What?" I asked.

"This guy, well he was like the love of my life, or so I thought." Amber laughed at the memory. "I lost my self to him and did he even think twice before he broke my heart!?" She yelled to no one. "No, not at all." Amber was quiet and thoughful for a long moment, then she met my gaze and I knew that the beer wasn't speaking for her this time.

"What do you mean?" I sat next to her on the sofa, careful to keep my distance. I wasn't a total jerk, I could see that Amber was about to spill her guts to me, and being the gentlmen that I am, I could not turn away.

"What if things don't work out for you and Bella?" She asked.

"They will. I know they will." I corrected her.

"That's not what I'm saying Edward. It's like, ok" Amber took a deep breath in trying to collect her thoughts then looked me square in the eye. "Don't you think it's smart of you to test the bounds of love before laying it all out for just one person? I mean, how are you supposed to know that she IS the ONE for you if you never test it?"

Good point, I thought. In all honestly, despite my rage for her recent outburst towards my Bella, Amber did have a point.

She ticked at her fingers, counting off each point she was trying to make. "Point one. Honesty. Secrets are a deal breaker."

"Bella and I have no secrets. We tell each other everything." I hung my head in my hands as party goers past around us in a blur.

"How do you know?" Amber asked with realy sympathy. "Who's to say that Bella isn't the Bella you think she is?"

"You don't know Bella." I smiled, thinking of how great, honest and sweet Bella was.

"Ok, I can see 'point one' isn't getting us anywhere. I'll move on. Point two. Sex."

"Sex?" I asked.

"Yes. Why is it that sex is always on the mind? Tell me this, how long did you go out with Bella before the two of you 'sealed the deal'? Excuse my terms of words please, I've had six beers tonight." She slurred a little, but still smiled. The Amber that I met that faitful day in Biology was coming back, and I could honestly say that I was glad the psycho Amber was missing. It was good to see an old friend.

"That's none of you business." I told her. My sex life, or lack of one, was nothing she needed to worry about. That was strictly between Bella and I.

"Ok, whatever. But tell me this. Point three, the most important point of them all.....the kiss. How many people have you kissed Edward? Be honest."

"Three." I answered without hesitation.

"Three? Really? Hun, I was thinking a number much higher actually." I play nudged her with my arm.

"Why is that the most important?"

"Because you can always tell who a person really is by their kiss." She said.

"I believe that." I thought of my kisses with Bella. Each different and special in their own way but at the same time, comfortable and reassuring...familiar.

"I kissed a grand total of six boys in high school, each with the same stupid, lame tounge action. Gross. But the moment I kissed Julia, well it just was something different."

Wait. Hold on a second. "Julia?" I asked. "As in, a GIRL?"

"Um, yeah get with the program Edward." Amber rolled her eyes. "Big fat lesbian over here. Have been for two years now."

"Oh." Was all I could say. "So this whole deal with hating Bella wasn't because you wanted me?" I asked.

Amber just about fell to the floor with laughter. "Don't flatter yourself." She chocked out. "You?" She questioned, laughing again. "Edward," She finally said, after her giggles had stopped. "My whole deal with Bella wasn't exactly about Bella at all."

"Explain."

Amber took a long breath and then answered me fully. "I just wanted you to know that you were making the right decision. I am so sick of love hurting people all around. Love makes you sick. Love makes you blind. You can not see clearly. You get so wrapped up in one person, you forget to think about yourself, and I just didn't want that for you."

"Love make you crazy." I said, nodding my head in full agreement. "Love can make you do all sorts of stupid things. That is ture. But you know what else love can make you do?" I asked. "Love can make you feel so alive, like you're on the edge of the universe and everything around you makes perfect sence. Love is knowing that no matter what, at the end of the day, someone will be there for you, someone is going to love you back and it's the most wonderful feeling to share with someone. Love is God's gift to man, when it seems all else is horrible, gray and depressing. Love, is my Bella." I smiled.

"Prove it." She countered. How dare she? What did she want me to do, sing a damn song for her?

"How?" I sneered. I was just in my happy place not a few short seconds ago, thinking of Bella. Now Amber had to go and mess me up again.

"Kiss me." She demanded. I looked at her like she had lost her stinkin mind. Had she? "Kiss me and tell me if there is a different than kissing Bella."

"No." I told her, but it was too late. Her lips planted themeselves on mine, and at first I didn't know what to do. Sticky with old lipgloss and breath tasting of beer, I was out right enraged.

"What is your problem!" I pushed back and wiped my mouth of thick lipgloss.

"Edward." I heard Rosalie say, her voice soft like she was in disbelif but firm, letting me know I was in deep trouble. "What have you done?"

That's exactly when I saw Bella.

Her eyes did not meet mine and that scared me so badly. How would I ever get past this point? If I could reach out to her....if I could just open my mouth, say something...SAY ANYTHING! Anything to make this moment better. Then it'd all be ok. Then she'd understand. We'd be ok.

"I'm just gonna," She whispered, and even from across the room, I could still hear her. Her voice cracked, and I wanted nothing more then for her to look at me. "Go." She said.

She didn't meet my eyes, she was intent on studying the floor. I had to go after her. I had to make this right again.

"I guess I shouldn't have kissed you." Amber sneered, from somewhere unimportant, seeing as I was off the sofa and quickly gaining distance from her. "It was good though right?" She asked.

"You wish." I told her then headed out the door in the direction of my Bella.


	13. Hollow Part One

**HOLLOW Pt. One**

**EPOV**

That first night was the worst, I couldn't process what had happened...how I had messed things up so badly? And even worse, I had no idea how to make it better. Would it have been better to not have given her what she wanted? Would it have been worse if I had gone against my word and given her a call?

Bella's words rang clear in my head and although I willed myself otherwise, the memories came flooding in.

_*flashback*_

"Bella, please come back to the party. It's late and freezing and in any minute, it will start raining." I tell her as I follow her down the deserted street. I'm far enough back to lend her some breathing room, but close enough to hear her wimper, like she's trying hard not to cry.

"I don't want to go back there." She slows her pace and then continues, "What Amber said...it's true."

Before I can correct her, let her know that Amber was indeed false, Bella keeps talking but still turned away from me, "And even if she hadn't pointed it out, someone would have. Eventually. Or worse, you and I would have continued on our path and then what? You end up realizing that I do infact keep you grounded, held-back whatever. Then it would be so much worse because you'll know how much..."

I stop listening to her. I know Bella well enough to say that whenever she's emotional, all thoughts of reasons are out the window. The logical, responsible Bella I know is no longer there.

"Bella, stop." I demand of her. She stops talking and turns on the balls of her feet. Her eyes are bloodshot and a little puffy.

I feel horrible seeing her like that.

"Look, you and I are together." She opens her mouth to say something, maybe even to protest, but I take two quick steps towards her and before she knows what happened, my fingers and tracing the faint pink line of her lower lip. I make a mental note of just how cute it is when she crys and her lips make that sexy little pout. "Nothing is ever going to change the way I feel for you." I declare.

"How could you possibly know that?" She askes, her voice small and defeated. Her eyes begin to water but no tears spill over just yet.

So I do the only thing I could think of to show her exactly how I feel.

I kiss her.

Gentle. Soft. And full of passion. When my lips leave hers, I kiss away a single fallen tear from her right cheek, then kiss the eyelid of that said eye. Then finally I kiss her forehead and whisper, "Never doubt how I feel about you."

Bella is quiet for a some time. She keeps her hands lightly placed on my chest, not as if she were about to push me away, but as if she needed her hands on my chest to help steady her.

"I love you." She says, then takes a deep breath and looks straight up into my eyes. "And if you feel the same for me, you'll understand what I'm about to say."

I square my jaw and tense for her words.

"I think we need to take a break."

_*end flashback*_

Even now, as I sit in an empty coffee shop just a few blocks away from my apartment, I can't help but think of what she would be doing. Is she thinking about me? How is school? Does she miss me?

I am a love-sick fool.

"I can refresh that for you if you'd like." The waitress asks. She tips her half-empty pot towards me and the pitch black coffee swirls from side to side. "Fresh. Brewed it myself." She adds.

It's not fresh, but she did brew it herself. I had enteratined myself earlier with watching her figure out that the coffee machine must have a filter of some sort or else coffee grinds will be everywhere.

"No thanks." I tell her. Honestly, I don't know why I keep coming back here. It's like this one spot in all of Seattle is my own personal beacon. It draws me in, only to depress and immobilize me upon entering. "I was just leaving."

The streets are dark and lonely looking. Half beaten up posters paint the city walls and even though it's well past midnight, the city still smells of fresh brewed coffee. The air is crisp and even though it pinches the tips of my fingers, I do not put my hands in my pockets. It's been 42 days since Bella and I started our break. It's the cold thats the only thing that makes me feel alive anymore.

My cell phone vibrates in my pocket and I ignore it. Jasper knows I can't sleep so I head out for some thought clearing and Emmett only calls when he wants us to meet up for some 'clubbin'. I am in no mood for 'clubbin'.

Two blocks had passed since my phone stopped ringing, but it did beep, signaling I had a new voice mail. Another two blocks and my fingers had finally had it. I rubbed my hands together and blew hot air into the hole that they had made. It wasn't working very well, now instead of my fingers fighting off frostbite I was in danger of my lungs inhaling too much cold air. I dipped into a near by bookstore eager to regain feeling in my extremities when I finally decided to check my phone.

It read:

'1 NEW Voicemail. From: BELLA'

Of all the times to not answer my phone!

As quickly as I could press my security code, my angel's voice came through my phone's speakers.

"Edward. I'm sorry I know it's late. Look, I really need to talk to you." Her voice was rushed and full of anxiety. "I need your help. I don't know what to do. It all happened too quickly." A broken cry escaped her lips. "My dad...he's hurt and I need you to..."

My voicemail cut off.


End file.
